Saturday, February 12, 2011
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
In the day to day
I have totally failed in having a consistent quiet time with the Lord. On the rare occasion that I do take the time to be alone with God, I hear pretty much the same message every time. Hmmm, maybe I should take it to heart, huh? Every time the message is plain, and simple: The true test of your heart is when no one is around, and/or you are just doing the day to day. What is your heart like when no one is watching and what is your attitude when it's something you think is ordinary or unimportant?
My attitude this year in my seemingly ordinary life? Well, I feel like I've always been looking for what's next instead of appreciating everything that's right in front of me. Makes on wonder what you've missed in the process of looking ahead instead of around you.
All in all, it has been a good year. Mostly full of the Lord humbling me and teaching me things regardless of my inactive spirit.
Thank you God for being so faithful, even when I'm being selfish.
You are so good.
Monday, August 23, 2010
Make My Life A Prayer To You
Make my life a prayer to You,
I want to do what you want me to,
No empty words and no white lies,
No token prayers, no compromise,
I want to shine the light you gave,
Through Your Son, you sent to save us,
From ourselves and our despair,
It comforts me to know you're really there.
Oh, I want to thank you now, for being patient with me,
Oh, it's so hard to see, when my eyes are on me,
I guess I'll have to trust and just believe what you say,
Oh, you're coming again, coming to take me away,
I want to die, and let you give,
Your life to me, so I might live,
And share the hope you gave to me,
The love that set me free,
I want to tell the world out there,
You're not some fable or fairy tail,
That I made up inside my head,
You're God, The Son, you've risen from the dead.
Oh, I want to thank you now,
For being patient with me,
Oh, it's so hard to see,
When my eyes are on me,
I guess I'll have to trust,
And just believe what you say,
Oh, you're coming again,
Coming to take me away.
I want to die, and let you give,
Your life to me, so I might give,
And share the hope you gave to me,
I want to share the love that set me free.
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Oh Life...
So, I am filling out job applications this week. Finally decided to move in with my sister and her husband 3 hours South of my current location. I'm excited, but mostly nervous as all get out. Not sure if I'll come up with enough money to buy a car, move, AND go to school. Maybe that's for the best right now. Could really use some prayers for all of this craziness.
Despite all my nerves about moving deeper into adulthood, I am pretty excited about possibly moving even FARTHER away next fall. Where? I'm not too sure about that minor detail, but I do know it will be out of the country. My best friend and I are praying about taking off for a year and working in an orphanage. We have a few lined up, but so far only one has contacted me back. It's in India : www.lordjesusministry.org .
I'll update more on all of this later. For now, I must work. Boss lady(a.k.a. Mom) is gone on vacation this week. I'm stuck back here to hold up the fort and watch 4 dogs. I feel like a crazy dog lady just sitting around working and talking to dogs all day. Oh no....I'm turning into my mother!! HAHA
Monday, January 11, 2010
Come
I will never grow tired of this song or the way it touches me every time I hear or sing it. Here's my heart, Lord, take and seal it--Seal it for thy courts above. Truth lies herein for me.Come Thou Fount
Come, Thou Fount of every blessing,
Tune my heart to sing Thy grace;
Streams of mercy, never ceasing,
Call for songs of loudest praise.
Teach me some melodious sonnet,
Sung by flaming tongues above.
Praise the mount! I’m fixed upon it,
Mount of Thy redeeming love.
Sorrowing I shall be in spirit,
Till released from flesh and sin,
Yet from what I do inherit,
Here Thy praises I’ll begin;
Here I raise my Ebenezer;
Here by Thy great help I’ve come;
And I hope, by Thy good pleasure,
Safely to arrive at home.
Jesus sought me when a stranger,
Wandering from the fold of God;
He, to rescue me from danger,
Interposed His precious blood;
How His kindness yet pursues me
Mortal tongue can never tell,
Clothed in flesh, till death shall loose me
I cannot proclaim it well.
O to grace how great a debtor
Daily I’m constrained to be!
Let Thy goodness, like a fetter,
Bind my wandering heart to Thee.
Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it,
Prone to leave the God I love;
Here’s my heart, O take and seal it,
Seal it for Thy courts above.
O that day when freed from sinning,
I shall see Thy lovely face;
Clothed then in blood washed linen
How I’ll sing Thy sovereign grace;
Come, my Lord, no longer tarry,
Take my ransomed soul away;
Send thine angels now to carry
Me to realms of endless day.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Life is but a breath
So, today I woke to an alarming text message that had been patiently awaiting to be read on my phone for several hours. It announced that a terrible car crash had happened while I was asleep involving 3 people I knew. One of them passed away.
He was only a year younger than I am and quite possibly one of the sweetest young guys I've ever met. I'm not going to exaggerate our connections. We were by no means close, but he always made me feel welcomed, accepted and listened to what those around him had to say. He was kind and it was very clear he had a genuine love for those around him. I don't know why, but I always feel like I just breathed a breath of fresh air for the first time after being around him. Like I had been living in a dingy basement or something. His character deeply impacted me.
It's so sad to me, even though I am still young, to see young people pass seemingly before their time. It hurts to see a life seemingly lived so short of it's potential. Then it dawned on me. I can't have been the only person who was so genuinely touched by this remarkable person. In the 20 some odd years of his life, I truly believe others must have felt this about him...perhaps even more. So, if this is true, then that doesn't really seem like such a life lived short by any means, but one lived to the fullest in the most mundane or ordinary circumstances.
Somehow this event has challenged me on some pretty deep levels. Life is what you make of it through the ordinary day to day, not saving up all of your energy for some distant, grand "what ifs" or "possibilities". Live life to the fullest, love those around you the way you want to be loved. Take time to enjoy the simple things. Listen to people like you really care-how do you know what that person is feeling or going through...it may just leave an impression that's impossible for the naked eye to see. Live like there's no tomorrow because maybe there won't be.
Life is so fragile, so multifaceted, why waste it worrying and spending your time making excuses. That's just my opinion. Good night.
Saturday, July 11, 2009
So, I'm finally back from Bushnell and all my Cornerstone Fest duties. Back to the real world. I need to find a job. I am super nervous about money, finding a job and a place to live.
There seems to be a theme running through my current circustances and that is "Get Off The Boat". Like when Jesus is walking on the water and calls Peter out. Peter had to make a choice. Do I get off the boat and trust the Lord will take care of me or do I stay here where the storm is raging and wave are crashing...but at least I know for sure I'm on the boat.
If I jump into this unkown, then what? Now I have to enter into total trust in God. Peter looked away from Jesus and let his fears of the storm overwhelm him. He started sinking, and stop believing. I keep looking away, and I'm not even off the boat. God help me have faith and trust in you.
The other day I had an amazing devotional with my lovely roomie Katherine. We read from Oswald Chamber's book My Upmost For His Highest. His writings struck to the core of my situation. I have decided to make my descision and work with this church I've been thinking about helping. I am going to chose to believe. I'm jumping off the boat.
I hope it blesses whoever reads this.
Do you have even the slightest reliance on anything or anyone other than God? Is there a remnant of reliance left on any natural quality within you, or on any particular set of circumstances? Are you relying on yourself in any manner whatsoever regarding this new proposal or plan which God has placed before you? Will you examine yourself by asking these probing questions? It really is true to say, "I cannot live a holy life," but you can decide to let Jesus Christ make you holy. "You cannot serve the Lord . . ."— but you can place yourself in the proper position where God’s almighty power will flow through you. Is your relationship with God sufficient for you to expect Him to exhibit His wonderful life in you?
"The people said to Joshua, ’No, but we will serve the Lord!" ( Joshua 24:21 ). This is not an impulsive action, but a deliberate commitment. We tend to say, "But God could never have called me to this. I’m too unworthy. It can’t mean me." It does mean you, and the more weak and feeble you are, the better. The person who is still relying and trusting in anything within himself is the last person to even come close to saying, "I will serve the Lord."
We say, "Oh, if only I really could believe!" The question is, "Will I believe?" No wonder Jesus Christ placed such emphasis on the sin of unbelief. "He did not do many mighty works there because of their unbelief" ( Matthew 13:58 ). If we really believed that God meant what He said, just imagine what we would be like! Do I really dare to let God be to me all that He says He will be?